Thursday, December 20, 2018


The Baal Shem Tov taught that the heavenly court has neither the power nor the capacity to judge you for what you have done with the life G-d gave you upon this earth. So this is what they do:
They show you someone’s life—all the achievements and all the failures, all the right decisions and all the wrongdoings—and then they ask you, “So what should we do with this somebody?”
And you give your verdict. Which they accept. 
And then they tell you that this somebody was you. Being now in heaven, you don’t recall a thing.
Of course, those who tend to judge others favorably have a decided advantage.
Better get in the habit now.

By Tzvi Freeman

Sunday, December 2, 2018

ChanukahTorah pulled from previous posts....

"Geulah is not a destination you can see by looking in front of you, you can only see it by looking inside of you." (so when we stare at the candles let's ask Hashem for the clarity to see what's really within....)

I saw something based on a lecture given by Rav Yitzchok Kirzner zt'l about the magnitude of change that can take place within us through lighting the menorah.  
As Aharon Hacohen was approaching the menorah to light it in the Mishkan, he paused, because the image of the eigel (Golden Calf) rose before him and he felt he was unworthy to light the menorah.  Moshe Rabbeinu understood why he paused and said, to him, 'once you have repented, don't look back, rather, move forward'.  Aharon found the strength to move forward and that strength carried through into the Chashmonaim as they searched for oil, and now has carried through to us, their descendents.

Let's do teshuva on the past, then leave it behind, so that as we light the candles we can reclaim who we really are,  and who Hashem created us to be, His people.


As many of you know it is an auspicious time to stay seated by the candles and daven for about half-an-hour...

There are various Minhagim as to which  Tehillim to recite after kindling the Neiros Chanukah.  As noted from various emails received over the past couple of days,  perhaps the most well-known to be recited:

Tehillim 90 (last pasuk - 7 times, as per Ramban) and Tehillim 91 (7 times, as per Rivash) - read 7 times aloud, and once more (8th time), silently. 
Then, Tehillim 30, 33, 67 ,19, 100, 133, 139
R' Levi Yitzchak M'barditchev in the name of the Ramban and the Ba'al Shem Tov - as a segulah for a protection for the coming year.
(Sefer Kedushat Levi L'Chanukahh, Sefer Halichot Yosef 676:4, Yesod V'shoresh Hoavodah 12:1)

Some add- Tehillim kappitel 121, Nishmas Kol
Chai, and Ana B'choach (7 times).
(Sefer Halichos Yosef 676:4, Yesod V'shoresh Ha’avodah 12:1)

As per Hakhel: Some additionally recite all of Kepitel 119, and all of the Shir HaMa’alos (120-134). When reciting Chapter 67, some recite it as it is published in the form of a Menorah, ahl pi kabbalah. Finally, some recite the powerful Shiras Chana (Shmuel I, 2:1-10).

May Hashem hear all of our tefillos l'tova.

A Freilichin Chanukah / Chanukah Sameach!

The Kedushas Levi says that each night of chanuka is mesugal for different things to daven for.
1 st night -not to be lonely or depressed.

2nd night- shidduchim,  shalom bayis

3rd night- good children,happy children, healthy
(Chasam  Sofer says when u cry in front of the candles u can be sure your tefilos are answered)

4th night- 4 imahos
To be a normal  woman, in my 4 walls, of true essence

5th night - chamisha chumshei  torah
Daven your husband should be a talmid chacham children.
By the 5th night more of the menorah is lit up can daven for more light in your life, for a revelation

6th night - simcha
You can have everything and still be sad, so opportunity to daven for simcha.

7th night -happy shabbos

Zmiros ,divrei torah by your seuda. Shabbos is source of all bracha.

8th nignt-mesugal for barren women
8 is above nature,  powerful day to daven.

Kedushas Levi says if you are planning to start something new ,if you start on chanuka it will be blessed.

 My Favorite Picture of all time- how precious are the mitzvos!!!

Special segulos for Chanukah,
as told by rebbitzin yemima mizrachi:

  • This is the holiday that emphasizes beauty. It is a mitzvah to beautify the Chag as much as possible, the most splendid menorah, the best decorations….

    • Use olive oil, but not just the regular kind, the best one: the one you would use to dress your salad and cook with. And the reasons are...

    • You’ll merit children that have a great memory, consuming olive oil helps you retain your memory

    • Children who are wise/smart, as oil rises above water

    • Children who have great eyesight, they will be able to see things with a clearer perception…

  • Chanukah comes from the root word: chinuch/חנך and it is at this time in particular that your reflection is one of love and approval towards them, a successful child is one that sees love and acceptance in the eyes of their parents

  • Mothers should not say to their kids, during Chanukah or at all, “I am tired” or anything in correlation to ‘I am tired ..not now’. This makes a child feel like they are not important and a burden to their parents and is very hurtful to them and so even if you are tired, and who is not… don’t tell them this

  • The mitzvah of the women after lighting is not to move, I repeat Do Not Move, after the candles are lit. Sit there and gaze at them for ½ hour, but again without moving, talking on the phone, getting up, or anything…. This is very hard but Rebbi Nachman from Breslov says that as hard as it is to sit and not do anything, so is the size of the yeshua you will get by sitting. But sit there and daven, pray for all and everything…

  • At the beginning of creation, Hashem created light, a very strong powerful light, that was so holy that the world would not have been able to withstand its’ holiness and so he ‘shrunk’ it, so to speak. And reduced it to what’s called “the hidden light/אור הגנוז”. This light in its’ full capacity will be revealed, B’H, in the future to come.

  • But in our days, the sparks of this light reappears to us under 3 different circumstances and they are:

    • When we daven/pray from a siddur, when we meet one of the 36 hidden holy tzadikkim of our generation and when we light the 36 candles of Chanukah. The sparks of this light give us the ability to ‘see and better understand’ Hashems’ ways. Adam HaRishon was able to see the entire world from one end to the other with this original light of creation and so we can perceive Hashems’ ways a bit better and clearer when we encounter the sparks of this light.

    • By davening we touch this spark and can better understand what Hashem is asking of us and we can get clarity on certain issues and suddenly have insight on issues that we are perplexed about. By meeting with one of the 36 hidden tzadikkim we also will touch this light by getting advice and direction from the mouths of these holy souls. And by gazing into the Chanukah lights we will get a mini glance into the understanding of Hashems ways. If you look you will see the ‘reflection of Hashem’ in the lights of Chanukah. Daven next to these lights and do not miss this opportunity to touch the ability to better understand things in life….

  • After the ½ hour has passed, and the candles still glow, every time you pass them by stop for a moment and pray. Don’t just pass them by…

  • The Father of the holy RamBam, zt”l had said that one should not belittle the power of frying soufganiot in oil. Use plenty of oil, don’t be skimpy, it is a segula for parnassa. But unless you want to make the local baker wealthy, you must fry them yourself and eat them as well. Better to be rich and fat, I guess then skinny and poor…. you choose… Anyway, it’s the utmost importance that you make them, you fry them and then you say the bracha of “על המחיה” at the end, which mentions theמזבח which is of course of most relevance during Chanukah.

  • On the last night of Chanukah traditionally called זאת חנוכהthere is a segula/a special energy that you may tap into for women who wish to conceive, ask from Hashem that in the merit of the eight days of Chanukah you shall celebrate B’H a bris milah on the eighth day for your son, Amen! Look at the candles and ask Hashem to give you a child….

  • For all of those who are single or know of someone who wishes to marry, here is one for you: on the Shabbos of Chanukah, you must first light the Chanukah candles and then the Shabbos candles. After both are lit, glance at them both and ask for a zivug, your marriage partner.

  • חזרה בתשובה/coming back to teshuva: in particular when it comes to our children. On Rosh Chodesh Tevet, on the eve of lighting the Chanukah candles there is an auspicious time for teshuva. On this day Yismael did teshuva and so the power of the day is teshuva. And if Yismael did teshuva certainly we can tap into that energy and ask Hashem to bring back our child/ren to teshuva just as Yismael did, the son of Avraham Avinu, עליו השלום. It is also a custom to light a candle for Rabbi Meir Ba’al HaNess on this night, זכר צדיק וקדוש לברכה.

  • Always light the Chanukah candles in your home, even if you know you will out and/or lighting elsewhere. Lighting the menorah invites Hashem to visit your home and that is something you do not want to miss….

  • When you are outside and see the different menorahs displayed in glory, you are buying emunah and bitachon/trust in Hashem. You are ‘buying’ into miracles, look at them…

  • Anyone in need of healing of the mind/בריאות הנפש the wordנפש stands for נר פתיל שמן and so during Chanukah there is a segula to ask for healing of the soul/mind and to look at the flame of the candle in its’ entirety and to recite Psalm 30:מזמור שיר חנוכת הבית

  • Ask for Mashiach all throughout Chanukah. משיח is hinted in the words: מדליקים שמונה ימי חנוכה

  • Whoever saw bad images, immodest images, frightening images; you or your husband and/or your children through movies or in real life, looking at the candles of the menorah will erase them from your hard drive memory or those in your family. Ask Hashem to erase them in the merit of the holy flames…

  • Donate tzedakah every night before lighting the menorah, it is a segula for your prayers to be accepted in favor.

  • There is great relevance in singing Maoz Tzur.

  • Last but definitely not least; ask for a miracle, a Big miracle in the merit of Chanukah. Ask for something that you think is impossible & that will be considered a miracle if it happens... Ask that Hashem to release those wrongfully imprisoned: Yonatan Halevi ben Malka Pollard, Shlomo Halevi Mordechai ben Rivka Rubashkin …***THE TEFILOS WORKED!!!

May we merit to see wonderous miracles this Chag and always and may we merit to witness the most precious miracle of all: the coming of Mashiach במהרה בימינו ברחמיםאמן

Hashem please send a refuah and yeshua to every one of Klal Yisrael!


Monday, October 22, 2018

I love this one...

Heresy in G‑d’s Name

By Tzvi Freeman
They asked the Baal Shem Tov, “The Talmud tells us that for everything G‑d forbade, He provided us something permissible of the same sort. If so, what did He permit that corresponds to the sin of heresy?”
The Baal Shem Tov replied, “Acts of kindness.”

Because when you see a person suffering, you don’t say, “G‑d runs the universe. G‑d will take care. G‑d knows what is best.” You do everything in your power to relieve that suffering as though there is no G‑d. 
You become a heretic in G‑d’s name.

Friday, October 19, 2018

Ever wonder why ...

we aren't as numerous as the stars?

In Lech Lecha ( chapter15,5) Hashem says to Avraham  "look at the stars and count them if you are able to count them", then  Hashem says to Avraham, "so shall be your offspring".

( from the teachings of Rabbi Meir Shapira)

Why does the pasuk say vayomer Hashem - "Hashem said" two times in the same pasuk- we know Hashem was speaking to Avraham.  However, there was a pause- when Hashem told Avraham to count the stars, Avraham literally went out to count the stars- he tried to do the impossible.  Then Hashem said- so will your children be like this- attempt to do the impossible- to live l'maale min hateva- break the boundaries of nature.

We are his children, perhaps not as numerous as the stars yet, but certainly we have that trait of attempting to count the stars.  Isn't that what the geulah from within is all about?

Good Shabbos!

This goal, when will we reach it?
It was once far, but now it is near.
When will we hold it in our hands?
When we will open our eyes to see it is already here.

Rabbi Freeman—among the last teachings we heard from the Rebbe.

Thursday, October 11, 2018


Our year has begun.
New beginnings - such a hopeful concept!

Here's why:

In fact, each moment is full of hope....hope for achieving in our avodas Hashem, hope for our loved one to have a relationship with Him as well, hope for unity and peace to pervade our homes and those of klal Yisrael, and really, truly, all of this is hope for the geulah- inside and out.

Friday, September 14, 2018

Yom Kippur....

If you're anything like me, you might be wondering what you are supposed to be working on exactly.  There are so many areas and details in a day, that when I think back over the year I am completely at a loss as to what specifically I should work on.  Everything?! And anyway...aren't we new creations as of Rosh Hashana?...

Before the anxiety grows too great, I breathe deeply, recall that with this breath Hashem is giving me another chance at life and the I can turn/ and return- teshuva to Him.  The first clarity I need is that He loves me and is waiting for me- forever.

Next, I look at who I am in this minute and notice what I love about myself and thank Hashem for those.  Then, I notice the things that I am not proud of :( and that's where my work lies.  I can't remember all the things I've done wrong this year but the result of them is sitting with me right now- as a part of me. 

 Now, I observe the thoughts, feelings and actions that I don't want to hold onto.  I admit to them, I regret them.  I say "I am sorry Hashem for doing, thinking, feeling...(fill in the blank with your own- trust me you don't want mine;).  I don't want to do/feel/think these things in the future. Please help me to be true to who I really am."

I've returned.

Your turn.

(If you want more clarity with this, our phone chaburah will IY'H be meeting at 11:00 am NY time this Monday- what can be better than group teshuva...or more embarrassing... therefore, there will be no recording.:)))

Wishing you a beautiful Shabbos and a Gmar Chasima Tova, 

Love, Aviva Ruth


By Tzvi Freeman

Teshuvah doesn’t mean repentance. Repentance means regretting who you’ve become. 

Teshuvah means returning to who you truly are.

Teshuvah, in English, is recovery.

 Recovering a lost inner self.

On Yom Kippur, we are all in recovery.

For any body still feeling anxious....

Thank you, Ilana Yehudis for sending this:
Adapted from a newsletter article by Rebbetzin Heller
Keep in mind that Hashem accepts you with all of your faults and broken pieces, you needn’t act as if they don’t exist.
Review the viduy before Yom Kippur in the machzor. 
Don’t fall into any of the usual traps when you read the list of potential sins that you may have done:

1. What a great list. It’s even alphabetical. How interesting. I think I did everything.
2. I am doomed. I think I’ll go out for pizza. This is too heavy.
3. My life is a mess. It can’t be fixed. No one who had a childhood like mine will ever be clean on the inside.
4. This is extreme. I’m basically a good person. What’s all this breast-beating good for?
5. I hate myself.
Instead, come to grips with the reality of imperfection. If you’re human, you’re imperfect. You have the chance now to open yourself up to greater and higher movement towards being the person you want to be. Every breath you take is a gift from the One who wants to (and can!) understand you totally. Read the list with the same sort of feeling you would have if you were discussing a heartbreaking issue with your therapist. You want to change, that’s why you’re there.
There is one critical difference. Your therapist can only help you hear yourself. Hashem can help you discover a self that you may never have encountered (or may have thought was lost). If you open yourself even a little bit, He will open His Heart to you beyond your greatest hope.

Sunday, September 9, 2018

Shavua Tov!
In a few hours Rosh Hashana is starting.!!! 
Aside from the fact that I’m waiting for my challahs to come out of the oven, I can’t sleep. 
I’m excited! It’s our opportunity to express our absolute love and awe of Hashem - to express our desire to be close to Hashem - to return to our most profound relationship.  We don’t know what the future will bring- some of us have lost a loved one this year- and our lives are irrevocably changed.   Yet, one thing remains steady and only grows with life each moment and that is His love for us.  Chazal say that Hashem brings us back to life every moment by giving us breath. He is showing us that He believes in us. 
Take a deep breath. Feel His love and belief in YOU. Now, believe in yourself and the power He is giving you to choose a relationship with Him. 
As we discussed in the last chaburah, at the time of the shofar He is re-blowing our purified neshama into us and we are offering back our primal will- see Rabbi Freeman’s picture and explanation below for a clearer understanding. 
Thank you for learning with me this year. Thank you -Shira - for the administrative job you handle for us- even as you have family members who are ill- Refuah shlaima to them.  
I’ve enjoyed every minute of our time together. Thank You Hashem for allowing us to learn and grow closer to You. 
May your year be filled with deveikus to Hashem through ways you perceive as good. May it be a healthy, peaceful, prosperous year with the geulah from within and without=for all of Klal Yisrael! 
❤️ ,
Aviva Rus

On Rosh Hashanah, we cry out from our very essence with the call of the shofar; He echoes back, throwing His very essence inward towards His creation.
Together, man and G‑d rebuild creation.
By Tzvi Freeman 

Friday, August 24, 2018

I can’t believe we are in the middle of Elul!

6 Tips for a SUCCESSFUL ELUL from Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi*

In Elul, if we do things right, Hashem will open up for us 13 faucets of mercy in preparation for the High Holidays. But how do we make that happen? Jewish Women, here’s your Elul homework straight from my teacher, Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi…

1. Improve and do something new: This first Elul homework assignment has 2 parts: Firstly, you need to take on a new mitzvah from now until Yom Kippur. Start wearing a long skirt for 30 days. Start praying mincha for 30 days. Start learning Torah for 5 minutes a day for 30 days.

Rabenu Yona teaches that when you accept upon yourself a new mitzvah for 30 days, you will exit from darkness out to a great new light. Hashem will see that you know how to change, and He will change reality for you: you will finally have the baby you have been waiting for, your marriage will finally improve, you will finally find that great apartment/job/husband you have been looking for.

Secondly, you need to improve your performance of a mitzvah that you already do. For example, you pray every day, but for the next 30 days pray with extra focus. You prepare every week for Shabbat, but until Yom Kippur prepare for Shabbat with extra joy. Less screaming and more smiling.

2. A VERY Important Psalm : The Holy Ari promises that whoever recites Chapter 27 (Hashem Oree v’Yeeshee, click for English translation) of Psalms twice a day, morning and evening, until the end of Yom Kippur, the 13 Heavenly faucets of mercy will open up upon him. Why this particular Psalm? Because it mentions God’s name 13 times. So every time you say Hashem’s name, another faucet opens up upon you.

The Ari guarantees, “Every one who says the 27th Psalm, from Rosh Chodesh Elul, in the evening and morning, every day, he is guaranteed a good year, and the coming year will be sweet, and even if an evil decree has been declared against him, it can be nullified. And all of the prosecuting angels will be nullified from him and from all of his family members as well as all difficult and evil decrees. And he will be judged innocent, because Hashem opens up for him the 13 faucets of mercy.”

א לְדָוִד: יְהוָה, אוֹרִי וְיִשְׁעִי–מִמִּי אִירָא;
יְהוָה מָעוֹז-חַיַּי, מִמִּי אֶפְחָד.
ב בִּקְרֹב עָלַי, מְרֵעִים– לֶאֱכֹל אֶת-בְּשָׂרִי:
צָרַי וְאֹיְבַי לִי; הֵמָּה כָשְׁלוּ וְנָפָלוּ.
ג אִם-תַּחֲנֶה עָלַי, מַחֲנֶה– לֹא-יִירָא לִבִּי:
אִם-תָּקוּם עָלַי, מִלְחָמָה– בְּזֹאת, אֲנִי בוֹטֵחַ.
ד אַחַת, שָׁאַלְתִּי מֵאֵת-יְהוָה– אוֹתָהּ אֲבַקֵּשׁ:
שִׁבְתִּי בְּבֵית-יְהוָה, כָּל-יְמֵי חַיַּי;
לַחֲזוֹת בְּנֹעַם-יְהוָה, וּלְבַקֵּר בְּהֵיכָלוֹ.
ה כִּי יִצְפְּנֵנִי, בְּסֻכֹּה– בְּיוֹם רָעָה:
יַסְתִּרֵנִי, בְּסֵתֶר אָהֳלוֹ; בְּצוּר, יְרוֹמְמֵנִי.
ו וְעַתָּה יָרוּם רֹאשִׁי, עַל אֹיְבַי סְבִיבוֹתַי, וְאֶזְבְּחָה בְאָהֳלוֹ, זִבְחֵי תְרוּעָה;
אָשִׁירָה וַאֲזַמְּרָה, לַיהוָה.
ז שְׁמַע-יְהוָה קוֹלִי אֶקְרָא; וְחָנֵּנִי וַעֲנֵנִי.
ח לְךָ, אָמַר לִבִּי–בַּקְּשׁוּ פָנָי; אֶת-פָּנֶיךָ יְהוָה אֲבַקֵּשׁ.
ט אַל-תַּסְתֵּר פָּנֶיךָ, מִמֶּנִּי– אַל תַּט-בְּאַף, עַבְדֶּךָ:
עֶזְרָתִי הָיִיתָ; אַל-תִּטְּשֵׁנִי וְאַל-תַּעַזְבֵנִי, אֱלֹהֵי יִשְׁעִי.
י כִּי-אָבִי וְאִמִּי עֲזָבוּנִי; וַיהוָה יַאַסְפֵנִי.
יא הוֹרֵנִי יְהוָה, דַּרְכֶּךָ: וּנְחֵנִי, בְּאֹרַח מִישׁוֹר–לְמַעַן, שׁוֹרְרָי.
יב אַל-תִּתְּנֵנִי, בְּנֶפֶשׁ צָרָי: כִּי קָמוּ-בִי עֵדֵי-שֶׁקֶר, וִיפֵחַ חָמָס.
יג לוּלֵא–הֶאֱמַנְתִּי, לִרְאוֹת בְּטוּב-יְהוָה: בְּאֶרֶץ חַיִּים.
יד קַוֵּה, אֶל-יְהוָה: חֲזַק, וְיַאֲמֵץ לִבֶּךָ; וְקַוֵּה, אֶל-יְהוָה.

3. Give Life: Every day of Elul, make sure to shine a ray of light to another human being who is struggling. Every day ask yourself, “Whom can I make happier today?” A Shabbat invitation to a single neighbor, a visit to a hospitalized relative, a note in the lunch box of a child making the tough transition back to school.

4. Forgive and Forget: Hashem gives us a special deal every Elul. Our Sages promise that: “Every person who forgives will be forgiven all his sins.”

We did a lot of sins this year that cannot be forgiven…We spoke lashon hara about people and cannot ask their forgiveness because asking forgiveness would hurt that person badly. We hurt a child, but how can we ask her for forgiveness when she is so young that she cannot fathom how deeply she has been hurt?

The answer…the next time someone insults you, hurts you, makes you see red, you remember “Every person who forgives will be forgiven all his sins,” and you say to yourself “Hashem, apparently you are sending this person to get me angry, because you want to erase my sins for me. So I’m cooperating with You. I’m not getting angry. I forgive her.”

5. Have Mercy on the Animals: “Every person who has mercy on animals—Heaven will have mercy on him.” In Elul we don’t kill little animals. In the case of pests (lice, cockroaches, etc) you can kill, but not with extra cruelty.

6. Watch Your Words: More of the special Elul deal. In Elul, your words to your family members have special weight. The Ramchal says that on Rosh Hashana Hashem considers all of the words that came out of our mouths regarding our family members. On Rosh Hashana, Hashem will ask His angels, “Tell me, what did she say about her husband in Elul?” The angels report back “She said that he’s stingy and lazy.” And Hashem writes down the words “stingy and lazy” in His notebook. According to what we say, Hashem judges our family members and US too. Be careful this month to only say positive things about your family members!l

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Parsha for Women by Rabbanit Yemima Mizrachi

Mattot-Mas’eiYom Chamishi, Tamuz 29, 5778 (July 12, 2018) #64  
for the 

Who’s in Charge Here?

Parashot Mattot-Mas’ei seem to have no connection to when we read them. Why now, at Rosh Chodesh Av, do I need to read about vows and oaths, about Hashem’s war against Midian, about the travels of the Israelites, and about cities of refuge for killers? These are the subject of this week’s parasha – and why should I care? The answer is in the common denominator of these subjects: 

ministerial responsibility.

For example, in teaching releases from vows, Moshe addresses the heads of the tribes: “You’re responsible!” In the war against Midian, Moshe addresses the commanders and says: “You’re responsible!” In the conquest of the land, Moshe addresses the descendants of Reuven and Gad, the wealthiest tribes, and reminds them: “You’re responsible – take responsibility!” And the perpetrator of an accidental homicide, who must flee to a city of refuge, remains there until the death of the Kohen Gadol – 

what’s the connection? “You have to be responsible,” Rashi understands this as addressing the Kohen Gadol. “You’re responsible for ensuring that in your generation there will be no bloodshed.”1

In other words: you have responsibility. The results are on your shoulders.

How is that connected to this time of year? Av is the month of the av the father! and his responsibility.

Parashat Mattot opens with a father who cancels his daughter’s vows. She takes a vow, putting herself into a
1 Bemidbar 35:25 and Rashi ad loc.
situation that’s not right for her now, and you, Abba, have to take responsibility for your daughter.

There’s also such a moving verse at the end of the ֵאֶּלהַהֻחִּקיםֲאֶּשרִּצָּוהה'ֶּאתמֶֹּשהֵביןִּאישְלִּאְשתֹו,“:section These are the statutes ֵבין ָּאב ְל ִּבת ֹו ִּב ְנ ֻע ֶּרי ָּה ֵבית ָּא ִּבי ָּה that Hashem commanded Moshe and Bnei Yisrael between a man and his wife, between a father and his daughter, during her youth in his home.”2

Rabbi Yaakov Abuhatzeira says: you’re like a little girl to your Father. During Av a Jewish woman must turn to Hashem and say, “Ribbono Shel Olam, maybe I’ve sinned; I might have ruined my life with my own hands” (so many girls say that to me!).
Well... oK, little girl. Abba’s here. Tell Him this: “Abba, You’re responsible now. It could be that I’ve destroyed all sorts of really important values. I’m in Your hands and You’re the grown-up here, Abba. Come along during this month and say, ‘It is permitted to you. It is canceled for you.’3 Your daughter restricted herself by mistake, with sin and guilt? Release her from it, Ribbono Shel Olam.”4

It raises feminist hackles. “What’s this paternalism?? A woman takes a vow – who are you to undo it?” But it’s not arrogant paternalism. Father, Father, Abba, is taking responsibility. It’s amazing.
.30:17 2
Bava Batra 120b.
4 Rabbi Yaakov Abuhatzeira, Pittuhei Hotam.

Av is the month for fathers and daughters. 

What does it say in the Haftarah? Look at your ִּב ְכָּרה ַק ָּלה ְמ ָּשֶּר ֶּכת ְדָּר ֶּכי ָּה appearance, daughter of Israel a restive young camel doubling back on her steps, and what happens to her? ְבָּחְדָּשה ִּיְמָּצאוְנָּה In her month they will find her.7 All the commentators agree: you’re in trouble. Your time will come any moment now, wayward daughter, to get what you deserve. But ְבָּחְדָּשהִּיְמָּצאוְנָּה“:the Haftarah is actually so consoling in her month they will find her,” in the month of Av the av, the abba, comes. Abba’s coming to take you, to free you from your city of refuge. These are just arduous journeys and encampments you’ve been forced to take during life. You’re actually so good, so pure.

There’s one man who takes responsibility for women’s suffering the Kohen Gadol. And just as we read in the parasha this Shabbat, at the death of the Kohen Gadol you can leave the city of refuge. The Kohen Gadol, Aharon HaKohen, died on Rosh Chodesh Av, as our parasha mentions. It’s the only yahrtzeit mentioned in the Torah. ,ַבחֶֹּדש ַהֲחִּמיִּשי ְבֶּאָּחד ַלחֶֹּדש - In the fifth month i.e. Av on the first of the month8, Rosh Chodesh Av, Aharon the Kohen Gadol died. He was the only one who took care of Israelite women’s beauty concerns during the long journey through the wilderness. He brought the Clouds of Glory,9 and our Sages explain that those were the desert’s Super- Pharm. Within the Clouds of Glory were perfumes and jewelry for the women so they would feel good about themselves during the odyssey.10
And he dies for you – you’re to die for – and we know that because in his death he says to you, “I’m freeing you now, my daughter. I’m taking responsibility for you. לֹא יֹו ִּסיף ְל ַהְגלֹו ֵת ְך. ַתם ֲע ֹוֵנ ְך, ַבת ִּציֹון He will no longer exile you. Your iniquity is finished, daughter of Tziyon.11 Here comes Abba to take you.”
Today and tomorrow, into Rosh Chodesh Av, is a wonderful time to light a candle for Aharon HaKohen, and to ask him to intercede for the Jewish women
7 Yirmeyahu 2:23-24.
8 Bemidbar 33:38.
9 Taanit 9a and Midrash Tanchuma Bemidbar 2.
10 Midrash Tehillim 23 and Devarim Rabba7 cited in Kli Yakar on Devarim 8:4.
11 Eicha 4:22.
that they be taken out of their exile in cities of refuge, that he pamper them with the Clouds of Glory in their homes; כל ְכבו ָּדה ַבת ֶּמ ֶּל ְך ְפ ִּני ָּמהָּ – the King’s daughter is all glorious within.12 I know so many women who receive so much honor on the outside, at work, or among friends, but who are so belittled at home.
So here, here comes your time as a daughter; your Father is coming to take you. May we have a good month.
Translated by Rav David Swidler
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12 Tehillim 45:14.

Wednesday, June 20, 2018


(Thank you Shuli for sending this post from Rabbi Katz's facebook page =the elevation seminar:)

"When your consciousness is occupied with negative thoughts which are rooted in emotional delusion - it dulls and desensitizes the heart. This effect is called the “foreskin of the heart,” i.e. a blocked heart. 

This psychological state actually causes a damaging effect in the higher spiritual worlds -- blocking them off from receiving divine spiritual influx from their Source. 

This causes destruction in the world itself. 

However, when one thinks positive thoughts they actually cause fixing and healing in the world, and through this kind of thinking the heart is purified and the negative thinking patterns are expelled. 

The result of this practice is that one can ultimately access supernatural abilities using their consciousness." 

Rav Nachman of Breslov - Likutei Eitzos, Machsovos V'Hirhurim, #4

This is the power that hakaras hatov gives to us! To thank Hashem we have to search and recognize the good that Hashem is sending each of us in every moment.  When we do this on a regular basis, we won't have space in our head for the negative thoughts.

We will IYH continue our "Reaching Your Essence"  chaburah on Monday at 12 pm.  Summer hours are changed from Sunday night to Monday afternoon.  Looking forward to hearing your voices.

Love, aviva

Thursday, May 17, 2018

please join us...

Please pass on to  your family and friends, thank you!!

 B’lev echad k’ish echad
Like One Man
On Shavuot, Sunday, May 20, 2018, 
Jewish Women will Unite Worldwide to say Sh'ma Yisrael.

Time: 4:00pm Israel     3:00pm Johannesburg  
2:00pm London     8:00am Chicago      9:00am NY    6:00am Los Angeles    

At the designated time for your time zone, please recite:

Shema Yisroel Hashem Elokeinu Hashem Echad

H-shem Hu Ha'Elokim

H-shem Melech
H-shem Malach
H-shem Yimloch L'olam Vaed

Link to Devorah Yaffa's pre Shavuous meditation


Sunday, May 13, 2018

Preparing for Shavuous; From:


Don't forget, tomorrow is Erev Rosh Chodesh and that means time for the special Sh'lah Hakodesh tefillah for our kinderlach and their precious Torah learning. You can see a copy of this Tefillah under the More Chizuktab.
2.Jewish Women Unite worldwide in saying Sh'ma Yisrael in unity on Shavuot. For more details, go to the More Chizuk tab and also take a look at this must see video describing this redemptive initiative. For the dropbox link, click here. There are close to 1,000 women receiving this email. If each of you were to forward this video to 10 women, then at least 10,000 women would potentially be saying Sh'ma together in unison on Shavuot day. If those 10,000 women were to just forward this video to another 10 women, then 100,000 women could potentially be saying Sh'ma Yisrael in unison on Shavuot day! The implications are immense!!!! Please help us spread the word. It's so simple and easy and could have cosmic impact!
May we all join together as one voice with one heart Shavuot day and proclaim together in unison: Hear Oh Israel, Hashem is our G-d, Hashem is One!

See you at Sinai! 
3. If you'd like to hear a guided meditation/visualization 
to help you plug into your neshama's experiential memory of standing at Har Sinai, check out my recording of "See you at Sinai".)
with love and blessings, 
Devorah Yaffa Singer